SUICIDE, SPECULATION, AND SATAN: ONE OF THESE THINGS IS NOT LIKE THE OTHER ONES
I’ll warn you up front, this week’s blog talks about suicide. If you’re feeling suicidal yourself, stop reading this and call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 1-800-273-8255.
I don’t like talking about this topic, but it’s in the news—although in truth, the death of Lilia Botuseva isn’t getting all that much attention, which is probably for the best. She and her boyfriend apparently killed themselves in an Airbnb in Greece, on or around New Year’s Eve.
The catch is that cops in Kefalonia say they suspect the pair committed suicide as part of a “Satanic ritual.” Because that’s a thing cops like to say sometimes. Fills in the awkward pauses, I guess.
This is also the part where I warn you that today’s blog will feature far less humor and glib irreverence than usual. Because, fuck, you know?
Botuseva was 23 years old and from Bulgaria. Her brother’s Facebook page says she disappeared more than six months ago. And that’s about all I can say about her for sure. Everything else people say seems to be speculation at best…
The New York Post (continuing its mandate to always be the single worst thing about New York) writes:
“Knives, candles and a pentagram symbol — used by devil-worshippers [sic] — were found near the bodies. The 24 hours before the first full moon of the year is said to be associated with Satanic practices.”
Notice the vagaries here: “Is said to be?” By whom, exactly? Speculation is one thing, but keep your fucking passive sentences out of this please.
Over on InfoWars, the batshit brigade did what they do best: snort a line of primo, high-grade speculation and let it all hang out:
“Sounds like the EU bankers are making use their ‘make it look like suicide’ MO,” one chimes in. By Jove, Poirot, you’ve cracked the case.
“The property is pretty much guarenteed [sic] to be possessed by demons now,” another says. Oh do fucking tell?
“These dipshites [sic] can put energy into killing themselves but nothing into protecting Europe from invading Muslims?” moans a third. So I guess he’s the real victim here, is what he’s saying? If only that were literally true…